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What's the right thing to do for mom and dad as they get older?

Thanks to advances in science and medicine, more of our parents are living longer than ever before. And though we are rewarded with more time with the people we love, we are also faced with new sets of complications—more diseases, more disability, more need for support and careful judgments. Yet while our health care system may help people live to an older age, it doesn't perform so well when decline eventually sets in. We want to do the best thing but are overwhelmed with the staggering choices we face.

Geriatrician Dennis McCullough has spent his life helping families to cope with their parents' aging and eventual final passage, experiences he faced with his own mother. In this comforting and much-needed book, he recommends a new approach, which he terms "Slow Medicine."

Shaped by common sense and kindness, grounded in traditional medicine yet receptive to alternative therapies, Slow Medicine advocates for careful anticipatory "attending" to an elder's changing needs rather than waiting for crises that force acute medical interventions—an approach that improves the quality of elders' extended late lives without bankrupting their families financially or emotionally. As Dr. McCullough argues, we need to learn that time and kindness are sometimes more important and humane at these late stages than state-of-the-art medical interventions.

My Mother, Your Mother will help you learn how to:

—form an early and strong partnership with your parents and siblings;
—strategize on connecting with doctors and other care providers;
—navigate medical crises;
—create a committed Advocacy Team;
—reach out with greater empathy and awareness; and
—face the end-of-life time with confidence and skill.

Although taking care of those who have always cared for us is not an easily navigated time of life, My Mother, Your Mother will help you and your family to prepare for this complex journey. This is not a plan for getting ready to die; it is a plan for understanding, for caring, and for helping those you love live well during their final years. And the time to start is now.

Average Customer Rating:

Reassuring	Customer Rating:
If you are dealing with an elderly parent with dementia (or other debilitating illness) this is a god-send. Just reading this reduced my stress level greatly and helped me be more patient and tolerant of my 93 yo parent who has mild dementia. Thank you for writing this. I have asked my daughter to read this so she can have these insights when I become old, feeble, etc.

"Slow Medicine" the 21st Century "Holistic"?

Customer Rating:

This lovely book is a cross between a manual on caring for elderly loved ones and the gripping story of the author's mother as she went from the "Everything's fine" stage to health crises and decline to her death. McCollough's chapters on the ER, the hospital, and rehabilitation facilities are envaluable guides for navigating chaotic and dangerous waters. He is so balanced and has deep understanding of the layperson's challenges in dealing with the medical system and medical personel. I love the term he coined, "slow medicine" to show that time and kindness can serve old people better than rapid-response medical interventions. "Holistic" does not adequately describe alternatives to allopathic medicine. Perhaps "Slow Medicine," with its tip of the hat to the popular Slow Food movement in Europe, will become the medical approach of choice, for not just the elderly but for anyone with chronic or degenerative illnesses. Anyone caring for elderly people could benefit greatly from this sensible, wise, and compassionate book. Nancy Manahan, author of Living Consciously, Dying Gracefully: A Journey with Cancer and Beyond, www.nanbec.com

Excellent Book!

Customer Rating:

Highly recommend this book for anyone dealing with an aging parent. It is very comprehensive yet well organized into the different stages of "decline", and user friendly. I have found it to be a great comfort and a good resource in dealing with my 82 year old mother who is in the beginning stages of senile dementia and is having a difficult time understanding that she can no longer live safely in her own home.

Excellent resource	Customer Rating:
I found this book helpful and sensitive on a subject near to my heart. I learned some things I'm doing right and things I can do better. Also am better prepared for the future. I wish the author were my mother's doctor!

Nothing More than Common Sense

Customer Rating:

I bought this book at the recommendation of someone else and was very disappointed in its superficiality. Anyone with a modicum of common sense could figure out on her own how to handle the problems raised in this book. I've been working through the process of aging with my own parents and found nothing new here to help me. I thought the author was, at times, quite patronizing. I'm not sure who his intended audience was, but it was not me. AKA Cooper